Band of Bachelors: Jake Book 3 Page 2

  He left a generous tip for the buxom cocktail waitress, avoided the slots, and wandered the winding trail to the Desert Oasis elevators. Jake was on the top floor, the Wedding floor.

  The dedicated penthouse elevator was all done in red hearts. A young couple Gerud guessed were barely legal were going to town, dry humping in the corner. He pretended not to look, though he was convinced people didn’t do that in public unless they got off on it.

  The doors opened, and he stepped back, motioning with his hand for the couple to exit in front of him. He followed behind as the young man put his arm all the way to his elbow down the girl’s pants and made her squeal.

  These types of things didn’t affect him anymore. He was on a mission and had the luxury of having no choices left. He was driven to earn back the respect his father had lost in him. If he could help Jake turn his life around, that might get him in his dad’s good graces again. If he could marry right this time, fix the rift in the family, and repair the hole Jake had created, Dad would be grateful.

  Gerud was counting on it.

  A hotel manager was standing in the hallway, speaking into a radio. He eyed Gerud suspiciously. Had something happened to Jake? Panic washed over him. Was he injured, or worse yet—dead? It took a second for him to figure out what emotion pooled around in his stomach. Jake’s death or injury would be a bad thing, not a good one.

  So he sucked up his gut, which did not resemble his brother’s in any way, held his breath, and decided to be ready with tears if he had to create them. He tented his eyebrows, puckered his lips in an “O,” and addressed the manager, who sneered at him.

  “Excuse me. This is my brother’s room. Is there some problem?” He tried to glance past the man, but the manager held out his hand and stopped him. “I’m sorry, sir. You’ll have to keep out.”

  But then he heard Jake’s voice.

  “Gerud! Get your ass in here.”

  He stared at the manager’s eyes and discovered one was blue, one was brown. “Is that invitation enough for you?” His grin was delayed just so the man knew it was insincere.

  The manager stepped back and answered a call on his radio.

  Inside the room, Jake sat on one of two cherry red chairs on either side of the window overlooking the strip. He was wrapped in a sheet. A huge security guard was standing next to him.

  “What’s going on, bro?” Gerud asked.

  “How should I know? I have no idea how I got here.” Jake rubbed his wrists.

  “We found Mr. Green tied to the bed. You know anything about that, sir?”

  Gerud shrugged.

  “Mr. Green claims not to know who did this.”

  “I’m his brother, not his social secretary,” Gerud answered. “He’s a fuckin’ Navy SEAL. He can usually take care of himself with the ladies.”

  Behind the security guard’s back, Jake gave him a three-finger salute.

  “Where are your clothes?”

  Jake gave him a sour look. “Beats me.”

  “You’ve been streaking again, then?”

  That got the guard’s attention. “Mr. Green, the Desert Oasis doesn’t allow nudity in the public places.”

  The obvious elephant in the room was the fact that what their cocktail waitresses and showgirls wore wouldn’t be classified as clothes, either. Nudity was what the entire hotel was fashioned around. That and the healthy sexual innuendos one could practically get pregnant hearing, Gerud thought.

  “Well, if I could find out who did this to me, I’d probably find my clothes.”

  “You can’t walk around in a sheet, bro. You honestly don’t remember a thing? How the hell does that happen?”

  The security guard gave a smirk. He didn’t say it, but Gerud could tell he was thinking, it happens all the time.

  “Okay then. I’ll file an incident report, and you let us know if anything further happens. And your wrists, you want to get them checked out by the medical staff here?”

  Jake held his hands out in front of him. “Wow.”

  “Sir?” the guard asked.

  Jake held up his left hand, showing Gerud the wedding ring there. “Something else I don’t remember, brother.”

  “Geez, Jake. Now you’ve done it.”

  The guard closed his metal clipboard box with a snap and rolled his eyes. “You guys try to stay out of trouble, ya hear?”

  Jake shook his head.

  The guard waddled to the doorway and, just before closing it, barked back, “Y’all have a nice day.”

  Gerud put his hands on Jake’s bare shoulders. “So who did you marry?”

  “I’m serious. I have no idea. I don’t remember a thing. I went in for that massage, and then, boom. I wake up here.”

  “Well, we had that massage around six or seven. When I left you, you were chasing cocktail waitresses and feeling no pain.”

  Jake swore under his breath.

  “You told me you were done with all that. You were going to just gamble a little and go to bed early.”

  “Well, apparently I ran into someone I thought would be a good fit for Wife number three.”

  “Four.”

  “Nope, three. I never married Monica.”

  “Huge point in Monica’s favor. Didn’t stop you from creating a baby with her, though.”

  “Having babies and getting married are two distinct things, or don’t you remember?”

  Gerud winced. He’d married, but discovered he couldn’t father children, which landed him a big fat zero on both scores, since the marriage failed because of it. But Jake just had to sleep with someone one time and she’d get knocked up. Life wasn’t fair, he thought. Notch something else Jake could do that Gerud couldn’t. Their mother loved all four grandchildren and lavished attention on them generously. The brothers agreed, their mother loved the grandkids more than she loved raising her own boys. Gerud’s gene pool wasn’t part of that affection, either.

  “So get your butt into the shower. I’ll bring up some clothes and let’s do a bit of shopping.”

  “Gerud, I have no idea where my wallet is.”

  He pointed to the counter in the bathroom. “Right there, kid. You think she cleaned you out?”

  Jake beat him to the bathroom, grabbed his wallet and found money and credit cards in it. “A little light on the money,” he said.

  “Maybe she took out her fee.”

  “Shut up, Gerud. I got a wedding ring on. That means something!”

  “Yeah, asshole. If only you could remember her name.”

  Chapter 3

  Jake couldn’t get the wedding ring off, even after trying it with soap in the shower. He was hoping that in time, when the swelling went down in his hands that he could get it.

  “So you gonna sleep in the suite tonight or are you coming back to our room?”

  Jake stopped the fork of eggs halfway to his mouth and thought. “Didn’t think about that.”

  “Better find out who’s paying first,” said Gerud.

  “Good point,” Jake said, pointing his fork at his brother.

  “I mean, aren’t you curious to see who you married? It could be important.”

  “Curious? Yes. But if it was important, I’d remember. So, it couldn’t be that.”

  “You do know Mom thinks marriage is a sacred vow. Something spiritual, stuff of angels and shit.”

  “Well, she’d have to think that to put up with Dad and all his drinking and womanizing ways. He hurt her real bad, Gerud. You remember.”

  Gerud was watching him very carefully. “I do. Sort of like how you treated Ginger.”

  Jake nearly spit out his orange juice. “Watch it with Ginger, bro. I never cheated on Ginger. Not once. Hell, I even cheated with Ginger on wife #2, and nearly once with Monica until one of the kids walked into the room.”

  “Surprised you can keep them all straight, my man. Well, at least you got a couple of carrot-heads out of it.”

  “Carrot tops.”

  “That’s what I said.” />
  Jake threw his napkin at his brother.

  “So we have tickets to Circus Bare tonight. You game?”

  Jake was thinking about the peach underwear and especially the satin crotch panties, curious to see the woman who filled them out.

  “Don’t you think I should ask my wife first?”

  “No problem.” Gerud mimicked searching the room for someone. “Oh that’s right, you don’t remember her name or what she looks like.”

  “Fuck you.”

  That got the attention of their waitress, who wore slightly more clothes than the ladies who served in the bar. “Coffee? Espresso?”

  “Espresso, please,” said Jake, “Thank God you have a machine.”

  “And you?” The waitress made a point to show Gerud she didn’t find him as attractive.

  “I’ll have one, too, because this guy’s paying.” Gerud was good with the sarcasm this morning.

  While she was off getting their drinks, Gerud pointed to the oversized golf shirt—his golf shirt—that didn’t fit Jake. “We gotta get you some decent duds.”

  “Where the heck do you think my clothes went?”

  “Maybe you got them wet? Threw up on them? Your lovely blushing bride is off washing them for you?”

  “You know, Gerud, wouldn’t she at least have my cell phone number and call me? I mean, if she came back, knowing I didn’t have any replacement clothes?”

  “Dunno, Jake. But I think we better get you some clothes just in case. Then if she doesn’t return, at least you can tag along with me to the show.”

  “So you think the bag I came up with was in the room, too?”

  “I have no idea what you did with that. You probably don’t even remember taking it. When we left for the massage, it was right there beside your bed. Can’t say.”

  They took a taxi to a Native American outlet mall where he bought a nice pair of jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. He turned down all the Aloha shirts, especially the ones with naked women on them. It was time to clean up his life. Although he was supposed to celebrate his release from Monica, none of his buddies had been there for him this weekend, or were tired of celebrating his exes, but Gerud was only too happy to tag along. Jake figured he wouldn’t be a SEAL forever, so it was time to start figuring out what he was going to do with the rest of his life, starting with eventually looking for something that would pay better so he could support all those kids.

  He was okay with the fact that none of his former relationships were big time career women. He liked that they wanted to devote themselves to being a mother first. It was time for him to step up to the plate, and like the guy had said in the AA meeting, become a man. A real man.

  Gerud was still trying to get him to buy the thong underwear and low hip hugger French stuff, but he bought a two-pack of boxers with red white and blue stripes and stars on them. A couple of tee shirts, plain white and plain light blue, and some canvas slip-ons rounded out the purchase. He knew the hotel had shave kits and toothpaste, so the only other thing he bought was some bargain cologne at the checkout counter at the jeans store.

  “The high school kids shop here,” Gerud said.

  “Yeah? Well I’ve got about as much money as a high school kid, probably less. And I’ve got four kids to support, so about time I started taking austerity measures.”

  Gerud chuckled. “Never gonna happen. You’ll change when you’re good and ready to.”

  Heading out to the car, Gerud asked him, “What ever happened with Monica anyhow? I thought she was crazy about you. That girl was fine.”

  “You know, I think some women figure hooking up with a SEAL will solve all their problems.” Jake shook his head. “Man, that’s just the start of their problems. We’re gone all the time, and when we come home, we can’t relax unless we get shit-faced, or all we want is to stay in bed, and not necessarily to screw.”

  “You didn’t like to screw Monica? I find that hard to believe.”

  “I’m not gonna talk about my marriage with you. That’s between her and me, but I’m just saying I knew it wasn’t going to work out, so I wouldn’t marry her. And then when she got pregnant, well, she thought for sure I’d marry her. I told her I loved her, that I’d love the baby. But my track record sucks.”

  “And then that’s when she got out the ax.”

  “No, that was the next day.” Jake wondered where Gerud had gotten his information. “Who told you that, anyway?”

  “Can’t remember.”

  Jake was certain he was lying.

  Jake checked with the registration desk and verified that his room had been comped by the manager based on prior Gold Club usages, and that two keys had been issued, one for him and one for Mrs. Green, whoever that was. He asked for a new key for security, telling the clerk he’d lost his key at the pool.

  A lot of the Team guys liked staying here because the manager was a former Team guy as well and knew their base salary was less than being a dealer on the floor. They were putting their life on the line every deployment, and it was getting worse and worse out there. But a constant was the fact that they got paid very little for doing so.

  And that was okay with Jake, or was before he had so many children. It wasn’t why he became a SEAL. He just felt like it was something he could do, was compelled to do. In his heart, he was a protector. And not a killer. He was there to preserve life. And yes, he guessed God put him on this earth to procreate, too, since it was so easy for him.

  “Okay, man. You get some shuteye and I’ll come up and get you about six or so? We can get some drinks and something to eat. Show’s at eight.”

  “Sounds good. Just the two of us, right?”

  Gerud frowned. “Of course. I wouldn’t set you up. That happens next time you come up here, okay?”

  Jake was fiddling with the wedding ring, which still hadn’t come off. His hands weren’t back to normal yet, and the purple marks where the ribbon had been too tight were starting to scab over a bit. Whoever had tied him up had an attitude Jake wasn’t so sure about. He was happy he got out of the restraints before too much time had passed or he might have incurred some serious damage to his hands.

  When he opened the door, he looked for the lingerie first, figuring she’d definitely want that first. But it still lay draped over the chair. He hung up his new shirt and put the shorts in a drawer. He found the headache medicine and tossed back four with complimentary bottled water. He lay the shave kit and toothpaste down and stripped, stepping down into the shower.

  He let the water drizzle over his pounding forehead. He knew he could dull the pain a bit with a beer, but decided against it. It was a small victory, but an important one.

  He dried off and headed for the bed naked, after latching the door for total privacy. He stopped by the wingback chair and fingered the lingerie.

  The bra and panty set was brand new. He knew about such things.

  Chapter 4

  Ginger and Karen took their seats in the theater. A troop of clowns was walking around the audience, stepping on the backs of vacant chairs while the audience arrived. A slow drip of water drizzled from the ceiling, landing right on the part in the middle of the red-haired clown’s head. He immediately put up his umbrella and looked all around. The droplets of water splashed off and into the laps of the audience members sitting nearby.

  Another clown on a bicycle rode down one of the aisles backwards and collided with the clown with the umbrella, and they both sprawled on the stage. Yellow-bodied fairies with blue wings drifted from the ceiling and landed on stage as their helmets lit up, glowing shades of blue and green.

  Vampy clowns followed audience members who were looking for their seats, imitating the walk and mannerisms of the unsuspecting tourists.

  The activity settled Ginger’s nerves. Karen squeezed her hand down low between them so no one could see.

  “You’re doing fine,” whispered Karen.

  “Is he here yet?”

  “No. Stop talking about it. Just f
orget about it. We have an hour until intermission.”

  She sucked in air. She’d had her hair done with a fresh style, giving it some curl, but no color was needed since her bright naturally-red hair was a showstopper anywhere she went. That fact wasn’t lost on one of the clowns who bowed to her and extended his hand.

  “Go,” whispered Karen, pushing her toward the aisle.

  She wanted to peek behind her, but then she heard Karen whisper, “He’s not here yet.”

  Ginger stood and curtseyed to the clown in the aisle. She was wearing a very low-cut, formfitting knit dress, showing just the right amount of ample breast and leg, and of course highlighting her hair color since the dress was a shade of pinkish orange.

  Her heart racing, she accompanied the clown, giggling in spite of herself. It was so unlike her to get up on stage anywhere, and here in front of a thousand people in the Grand Oasis Theater, it was so large she felt like she was walking through an airport terminal.

  Two other clowns walked over and surveyed her. The first clown turned her around while the others scratched their chins and nodded. They took turns dancing with her. One of the actors whispered in her ear, “Relax. You’re the most beautiful woman in the theater. Allow us to let you glow. Just enjoy it.”

  She gazed into his green eyes, the same color as hers, and found a friend there, behind war paint. “Thank you.”

  “Tell me you are not here alone.”

  Ginger smiled. Another clown took her in his arms and twirled her effortlessly like a professionally trained ballroom dancer. She had a bit of training and knew the best thing was to just relax and go with his rhythm and not try to keep any sort of time. The beautiful thing about dancing, she thought, was that the man was always in control, so she gave herself up to him and just allowed him to make it appear she was gliding.

  The third clown cut in and grabbed a rose from a flower cart nearby. Placing it in his teeth, he swung her in romantic sways back and forth, and then bent her back nearly to the floor. “Magnifico!” he whispered.